I was 25 when I had my first child (which, to this day I still consider very young.) I had a decent-ish job, a flat that was quaint-ish, but not suitable to bring a child up in, (but we had a roof over our heads nontheless, so who was I to complain?) And my childs father, let's just say we'll leave him out of this, as he was far from a doting one, or father at all for that matter. The pregnancy was smooth and far from arduous (as I had expected) and labour, well, the 30 something hours I spent in it means that I very rarely like to relive as it resulted in a C-section that I am still not over.
Despite all of the above, she arrived. All 9lb 11ounces of her. Delicate, precious, soft and a complete honour to my womanhood. I was a mother. I never sought advice and tips from books and parenting magazines like most pregnant women I knew, they were simply not my style. I actually remember flicking through one on a news stand in the city and thinking 'this is absolute garbage.' The mothers I knew did not look as pristine as the images would present. When a close friend of mine had her first child I did not recal her appearing at the door fully dressed in designer gear, hair and teeth brushed with a full face of make up. She lived in leggings and t-shirts for about 6 months straight and you were sure to find some kind of spit up or gunk of some sort on them. That for me was my motherhood reality and I relished the realness of it.
You see I am not ashamed to say that I am infact winging motherhood and I honestly think most are, but are too ashamed to admit it. Presumambly because society consistently embellishes images of motherhood, which leaves many of us assuming that we we haven't quite got it right or that we are doing everything wrong.
There is nothing more trustworthy than your motherly instinct and doing motherhood entirely your way. So instead of keeping up the pretense that we have every corner of motherhood covered - let's be real and honest and say that most of us in all actuality are simply just winging it and that's totally okay.
